Sorry to hear about your troublesome chuckie. They'll do that. Don't sweat it, it's a learning process. Now, as for the heavy smoke, it was probably just in the smoke too long. I didn't see where you mentioned what kind of wood you used, but that can have an effect too, as well as the type of smoke you're getting. Thick white smoke will impart a bitter, acrid flavor. Thin blue or nearly invisible smoke is what you want.
The tough, gray meat is a clear indication to me that you just needed to wait a little longer. Again, it's a learning process and it'll come in time. If you haven't thrown it in the trash in disgust, you can still salvage it. Just take it out of the fridge, wrap it in foil with a little beef broth and put it in the oven at 300˚ until you can insert a toothpick with no resistance. Plan for 2 hours. It shouldn't take that long, but you never know.
For next time, try smoking at a little higher temp. Shoot for 275˚. Let it ride in the smoke until it hits 150˚-160˚. At that point wrap it and either put it back in the smoker or in the oven and wait 'til it hits 185˚-190˚, then start checking for tenderness. You already know what a roast feels like when it's NOT tender, so recognizing when the collagen breaks and it's tender should be easy.
Oh, and as for the family waiting on dinner, well that happens too. At least to me. I'm notorious for everything taking longer than expected and dinner being late. A friend told me the other day that he's learned to eat dinner before he comes over to my place for BBQ. "It's worth the wait, but since we don't usually eat until 10 or so, I need a little something to keep me goin."