Another Sunday.....Already!

  • Some of the links on this forum allow SMF, at no cost to you, to earn a small commission when you click through and make a purchase. Let me know if you have any questions about this.
SMF is reader-supported. When you buy through links on our site, we may earn an affiliate commission.

sawhorseray

Legendary Pitmaster
Original poster
OTBS Member
★ Lifetime Premier ★
Oct 17, 2014
7,938
12,805
Gilbert, AZ
The day finally arrived. Forrest Gump dies and goes to Heaven.
He is at the Pearly Gates. However, the gates are closed, and Forrest approaches the gatekeeper.
The gatekeeper said, 'Well, Forrest, it is certainly good to see you. We have heard a lot about you. I must tell you though, that the place is filling up fast, and we have been administering an entrance examination for everyone. The test is short, but you have to pass it before you can get into Heaven.
Forrest responds, 'It sure is good to be
here, sir. But nobody ever told me about any entrance exam. I sure hope the test ain't too hard. Life was a big enough test as it was.'
The gatekeeper continued, 'Yes, I know, Forrest, but the test is only three questions.
First:
What two days of the week begin, with the letter T?
Second:
How many seconds are there in a year?
Third:
What is God's first name?
Forrest leaves to think the questions over. He returns the next day and sees St. Peter, who waves him up, and says, 'Now that you have had a chance to think the questions over, tell me your answers.'
Forrest replied, 'Well, the first one -- which two days in the week begins with the letter 'T'? Shucks,
That would be
Today and Tomorrow.'
The gatekeeper's eyes opened wide and he exclaimed, 'Forrest, that is not what I was thinking, but you do have a point, and I guess I did not specify, so I will give
you credit for that answer. How about the next one?'
'How many seconds in a year?'
Now that one is harder,' replied Forrest, 'but I thunk and thunk about that, and I guess the only answer can be
twelve.'
Astounded, the gatekeeper said, 'Twelve? Twelve? Forrest, how in Heaven's name could you come up with twelve seconds in a year ?
Forrest replied, 'Shucks, there's got to be twelve:
January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd...
'Hold it, interrupts the gatekeeper. 'I see where you are going with this, and I see your point, though that was not quite what I had in mind... but I will have to give you credit for that one, too. Let us go on with the
third and final question.
Can you tell me God's first name'?
'Sure,' Forrest replied, it's Andy. '
'Andy?'
exclaimed the exasperated and frustrated gatekeeper. Ok, I can understand how you came up with the answers to my earlier questions, but just how in the world did you come up with the name Andy as the first name of God?
You are going to love this
...'Shucks,
that was the easiest one of all,' Forrest replied. I learnt it from the song,
ANDY WALKS WITH ME,
IMG_7048.jpeg
IMG_7053.jpeg
IMG_7054.jpeg
IMG_7057.jpeg
IMG_7058.jpeg
IMG_7059.jpeg
IMG_7060.jpeg
IMG_7061.jpeg
IMG_7065.jpeg
IMG_7066.jpeg
IMG_7074.jpeg
IMG_7077.jpeg
IMG_7078.jpeg
IMG_7079.jpeg
IMG_7080.jpeg
IMG_7087.jpeg
IMG_7088.jpeg
IMG_7089.jpeg
IMG_7094.jpeg
IMG_7095.jpeg
IMG_7097.jpeg
IMG_7098.jpeg
IMG_7101.jpeg
IMG_7102.jpeg
IMG_7103.jpeg
IMG_7106.jpeg
IMG_7241.jpeg
IMG_7248.jpeg
IMG_7250.jpeg
IMG_7251.jpeg
IMG_7253.jpeg
IMG_7255.jpeg
IMG_7310.jpg
IMG_20230811_170448.jpg
mceclip0 (1).jpg
mceclip0 (1).png
mceclip0 (2).png
mceclip0 (3).png
mceclip0 (4).png
mceclip0.jpg
mceclip0.png
mceclip1.jpg
mceclip2.jpg
mceclip4.jpg
mceclip5.jpg
mceclip6.jpg
mceclip7.jpg
mceclip8.jpg
Older.jpg
Screenshot20at20PM.png
 
Those were awesome Ray! I finally found the joke section again... or remembered to go look lol!

Ryan
 
  • Like
Reactions: sawhorseray
Works great, now I am getting alerts, Thank you .
For posting , don't know why I did not think of following the forum .
Thanks for helping me to see the light and now the jokes also.

Old guys rule, at least in my mind

David
I have no idea what you did or how you pulled it off David, this being Wednesday I'll post a fresh batch. RAY
 
SmokingMeatForums.com is reader supported and as an Amazon Associate, we may earn commissions from qualifying purchases.

Latest posts

Hot Threads

Clicky