Six Degrees of Blonde

Discussion in 'Jokes' started by the iceman, Mar 11, 2009.

  1. the iceman

    the iceman Smoking Fanatic

    1st Degree:
    A married couple was asleep when the telephone rang at two in the morning. The wife (undoubtedly blonde), picked up the telephone, listened a moment, and said, "How should I know, that's 200 miles from here!" and hung up. The husband said, "Who was that?" The wife said, "I don't know; some woman wanting to know 'if the coast is clear. '"

    2nd Degree:
    Two blondes are walking down the street. One notices a compact on the sidewalk and leans down to pick it up. She opens it, looks in the mirror, and says, "Hmm, this person looks familiar.... " She hands it to the second blonde. The second blonde looks in the mirror and says, "You dummy! It's me!"

    3rd Degree:
    A blonde suspects her boyfriend of cheating on her, so she goes out and buys a gun. She goes to his apartment unexpectedly and when she opens the door, she finds him in the arms of a redhead. Well, the blonde is really angry. She opens her purse to take out the gun, but as she does so, she is overcome with grief. She takes the gun and puts it to her head. The boyfriend yells, "No, honey, don't do it!" The blonde replies, "Shut up, you're next!"

    4th Degree:
    A blonde brags about her knowledge of state capitals. She proudly says, "Go ahead, ask me, I know all of them." A friend says, "OK, what's the capital of Wisconsin?" The blonde replies, "Oh that's easy: W!"

    5th Degree:
    What did the blonde ask her doctor when he told her she was pregnant? "Is it mine?"

    6th Degree:
    Returning home from work, a blonde was astonished to see that she had been robbed. She telephoned the police at once and reported the crime. The police dispatcher broadcast the call on the channels, and a K-9 unit patrolling nearby was the first to respond. As the K-9 officer approached the house with his dog on a leash, the blonde ran out on the porch, shuddered at the sight of the cop and his dog, and then sat down on the steps. Putting her face in her hands, she moaned, "I come home to find all my possessions stolen. I call the police for help, and what do they do? They send me a BLIND policeman!"
  2. grothe

    grothe Master of the Pit OTBS Member SMF Premier Member

    Hope cowgirl's in a good mood when she see this one! [​IMG]
  3. meat hunter

    meat hunter Master of the Pit SMF Premier Member

    Thats funny. Printed it and the wife is going to post it at her work.
  4. cowgirl

    cowgirl Smoking Guru OTBS Member

    LOL!!! Gene [​IMG] ....

    It was a funny one ICEMAN. lolol
  5. dave958

    dave958 Fire Starter SMF Premier Member

    This is good have to take it to work

  6. the iceman

    the iceman Smoking Fanatic

    A young blonde woman decides to try horseback riding, even though she has had no lessons or prior experience. She mounts the horse, unassisted, and the horse immediately springs into action. As it gallops along at a steady and rhythmic pace, the blonde begins to slip from the saddle. In terror, she grabs for the horse's mane, but cannot get a firm grip. She tries to throw her arms around the horse's neck, but she slides down the side of the horse anyway!

    The horse gallops along, seemingly impervious to its' slipping rider. Finally, losing her frail grip, the blonde attempts to leap away from the horse and throw herself to safety. Unfortunately, her foot becomes entangled in the stirrup, and she is now at the mercy of the horse's pounding hooves as her head is struck against the ground over and over and over.

    As her head is battered against the ground and she is mere moments away from unconsciousness, to her great fortune, Frank, the Walmart greeter, sees her and unplugs the horse.
  7. vtanker

    vtanker Meat Mopper

    My wife is blond and I am going to be in trouble but I can not resist. I will hang these on her vanity mirror!
  8. smokestars

    smokestars Fire Starter SMF Premier Member

    Great Blond info... guess I need to print it out and see how much trouble it can cause....


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