A Christmas Smokers poem

Discussion in 'Beef' started by needsmetidaho, Dec 19, 2011.

  1. To Marinade, or not to Marinade: that is the question:
    Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer
    The slings and arrows of outrageous Brining,

    Or to take arms against a sea of Injecting,
    And by opposing end it? To smoke: to sleep;
    No more; and by a sleep to say we end
    The heart-ache and the thousand natural shocks of
    that Grill that wont light,

    'tis a consummation Devoutly to be wish'd. To Rub, to Rub;
    To Rub: perchance to figure out what to Rub: ay, there's the rub;
    For in that lack of sleep what dreams may come

    When we have shuffled off this mortal smoker,
    Must give us pause: there's the respect
    That makes calamity of so long hours;

    For who would bear the Grill marks and temperatures of too much smoke,
    The temperatures wrong, the proud man's old smoker dies,
    The pangs of despised foiling, the days delay,

    The insolence of the cold and the spurns
    That patient merit of the unworthy Internal Temperature,

    When he himself might his BBQ Sauce make
    With a bare Slab of Brisket? who would his cold butt bear,
    To grunt and sweat under a weary overnight smoke,

    But that the dread of that after death,
    The undiscover'd Burt Ends from whose bourn

    No Smoke returns, puzzles the will
    And makes us rather bear those ills we have
    Than fly to other smokers that we know not of?

    Thus those dang temps that seem to never change does
    make cowards of us all;

    And thus the native Southerners of resolution
    Is sicklied o'er the lack of bark,

    And enterprises of great Mesquite and Hickory
    With this regard their Cherry Wood turned moldy,
    And lose the name of the dry rub. – Wet rub you now!

    The fair Egg Smoker! Colorful, in thy shape
    Be all my smokes remember'd.
    Last edited: Dec 19, 2011
  2. pops6927

    pops6927 Staff Member Moderator Group Lead OTBS Member SMF Premier Member

    A lament to smokers everywhere!  Is this original?  

    Thank you for the post!
    Last edited: Dec 19, 2011
  3. Well, the bones of it is Shakespeare. Cant take credit for that. But I did all the mods to make it smoke worthy.
  4. chef jimmyj

    chef jimmyj Staff Member Moderator Group Lead OTBS Member

    That was freakin' Brilliant!... Tis feckless to wax poetic lest thine coloquy beset benighted aural sense!...And I are one!...[​IMG]...JJ
  5. Thank you!!!

    Apprecaite it.
  6. shooterrick

    shooterrick Group Lead OTBS Member SMF Premier Member

    And with the simple tho pure of mind I say smoke on smoke on.

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